Whitey Harwood’s From the Wood Shed: You light up my life

Published 12:00 am Sunday, October 16, 2022

On Tuesday, Oct. 4, this was on the bottom half of the Salisbury Post — County Green Lights Helping Veterans.  I got so excited and could hardly wait to get to page 6A.

After reading the three paragraphs about “Operation Green Light,” I called the RoCo Manager’s office.

I told them what a noble thing to do, but could they be more patriotic and issue a purple bulb for the few, the proud and the brave that shed their blood on foreign soil for this great country of ours.  The woman I was talkin’ to said, “Oh, we can’t allocate for that.”

So, I read it again and wondered.

I wondered how they allocated $10,000 for a wall for one person.  I wondered how they allocated a place for a trophy that they didn’t deserve.  I wondered why they allocated the week of Nov. 7-13 as the observance, instead of the week of Nov. 6-12.  Then I realized since RoCo is backwards, they used the 2021 calendar instead of the 2022 one.

I wondered why they will “commemorate” veterans instead of honoring veterans.  It seems to me they should commemorate veterans on Memorial Day.

I was wondering how you display a light outside your window.

I was wondering why veterans that need help don’t go to the VA Hospital or to the Cabarrus County Veterans Service Office.

So here goes my plan.  To honor the five Bored members and the manager, I’m gonna go with yellow lights.

For Greg, Jim and Judy, the bulbs will be dim yellow.

I always like a little music with my support, so for them three I’ll be playing “Dim Lights, Thick Smoke and Loud, Loud Music.” By the “Voice,” Vern Gosdin.

I might get too supportive and forget the words and start singin’ “Dim Wits, Blowing Smoke and Loud, Loud Chin Music.”

I’ve never had any dealings with Mike Caskey, so I was going to shun him, but after reading his quote about the “Operation,” he also gets a dim yellow light, a very dim one, with a blue X on it to “commemorate” his run for sheriff.

He said, “This is the first year we did it, so I look for it to go forward in the future.”  He forgot this is RoCo.  In the other 99 counties in NC, it would go forward, but in RoCo I look for it to go backward.

That leaves Craig Pierce.  For his light I’m gonna screw him in a light bulb that’s burned out.

For the county manager, I’m gonna gather up five or six bags of heart shaped bulbs, and the next time someone has a balloon release, I’ll see if they will tie the bulbs to their balloons.  We’ll see how many make it to heaven or how many land in his yard or some other pillar’s yard.

Then maybe, just maybe, you — Aaron Church —  can explain to the folks that can do and should do something about it, that “releasing balloons” is littering and littering is against the law.

Sorry, Mike and Craig didn’t make the song list, but for Aaron I’ll be playing “The Happy Organ” by Dave “Baby” Cortez.

“Sometimes it’s more important to change politicians than light bulbs.” – Robert F. Kennedy, Jr.

Now come on up  in here Willie and sing “Turn Out the Lights, the Party’s Over.”

Keep on smilin’.

Whitey Harwood lives in Rowan County.

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