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Linda Beck: What am I?

I am what I am, but I’m not what I used to be! Some of my friends say that applies to all senior citizens, but I know a lot of things others can still do that I cannot. Of course I’m thankful for what I can do and what I know, but at times it can be so frustrating when I can’t remember things I used to know.

Right there in that paragraph the word used was used twice and a lot of times when I am writing, I can no longer remember if it should be use or used so I went to def.com on the internet to refresh my memory. (Oh, that is so much more interesting and easier than using my heavy antique dictionary!)

I decided I had to write this story for myself, but some of you might enjoy another English lesson by the teacher that never was. Once in awhile I call my school-teacher daughter to ask about certain words but she reminds me that her forte’ is social studies, not English, Spanish, French, or Latin.

While writing this, I also checked that word on def. com to make sure this was a good place for an under-educated woman to use forte. From both Latin and French, forte means strong or something at which someone excels. I could write another story about some of my daughter’s strengths, but she prefers I not write about her.

Well, I’m off “chasing rabbits” again, so back to the English lesson on the word use (yooz), used, uses, or using:

  • To put into service or apply for a purpose; employ
  • To avail oneself of; practice: use caution
  • To conduct oneself toward; treat or handle
  • To seek or achieve an end by means of as in “used their highly placed friends to gain access”
  • To take or consume, partake of, as in “She rarely used alcohol.”
  • “used” as in the past tense followed by “to”… in order to indicate a former state (example: Mail service used to be faster.) That is another story, in itself, after the headlines on the news about the postal system.

Well, this lesson was a great reminder of how a writer used to know when and where to use this word. But that takes me back to the first line in the story…I am what I am but, unfortunately, not what I used to be.

Once I started writing a story and I was going to call it “I Am.” I am a speaker and writer for my heavenly father. I was my mother’s daughter, my husband’s wife, and the mother of two girls. Now I am a grandmother several times over.

These days “I” am more interested in writing about the great “I AM,” our Father God. In the Old Testament, God said His name is “I AM!” He did not say “I WAS,” “I used to be,” or “I will be.” His name is I AM and it’s best that we not forget that!

In Second Corinthians 6:2 God says, “In the time of my favor I heard you, and in the day of salvation I helped you.” Paul wrote: “I tell you, now is the time of God’s favor, NOW is the day of salvation.”

A pastor said we should have now faith, not future faith! We should give thanks daily for our blessings. These prayers should be addressed to our Now God instead of to a God that some people do not even believe ever was, is, or will be. We need to live in faith, being patient and expectant. It is interesting how some people believe there is no God until a time of trouble and then they cry out “Oh My God.”

I heard on a TV quiz show that OMG is now an abbreviation for that and is used on the internet, emails and texting. Every day I have so much for which to be thankful and that could be another lesson on definitions. But I’m sure most of you have enjoyed a period of thankfulness at some time in your life so remember to thank God, even on the bad days!

So what am I? There is a song that tells me “I am an imperfect, but forgiven child of God” and that “I am greatly blessed and highly favored.”

Do you know who you are? Are you a believer in the great “I AM?”

Trust God, study His word, and pray even in the bad times; He may bless you with more of the good times!

Linda Beck lives in Woodleaf.





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