• 64°

Helping the new bride stay slim

By Ester Marsh
For the Salisbury Post
The following question has been in my file a while. Initially I didn’t know how to answer the question without hurting anyone’s feelings but since my big day was coming ó and as you all know I like to put my own experiences in my columns ó this was the perfect question for this perfect time to answer.
Q. My wife and I have been married for one year. I love her very much and am scared to hurt her feelings. Since we have been married she has gained at least 30 pounds.
What can I do or say without hurting her feelings or our relationship to have her lose weight?
A. The reason that I have been sitting on this question for a while is that I wasn’t sure which way to run the answer.
As you are reading this, my husband Kevin and I are on our way back from our honeymoon! As for any couple who is getting ready to get married, the time getting ready is so exciting and you both want everything to be perfect, whether it is a small wedding or big wedding.
Brides and grooms are known to lose weight and get in shape just for this special occasion. I look at myself (quite seasoned in the marriage department.)
This time around, I’ve spent lots of beauty time for hair, make-up and hands and feet. It is a shame that we don’t treat ourselves sometimes “just because.”
So here is where I am going with this answer ó was your wife heavier when you met her and proposed to her? Is she maybe just back to her normal size?
Lots of times that happens but the husbands ó and in some cases wives ó just remember the wedding pictures.
Or was she skinny and she now has gained weight? Did she have children? Has her blood pressure and/or cholesterol gone up? Has her energy level declined?
These are all questions which are very important to know how to start an exercise program and for you to know how to support your wife.
One thing is for sureópositive re-enforcement is the key!
Focus on her health and don’t point out women and say: That is how I want you to look. (Unless you want to sleep in the dog house!)
Help her to eat healthy so don’t have ice cream and tell her she can’t have it because she needs to lose weight. Go to the YMCA or health club with her and exercise beside her. Do something she likes ó like taking a Zumba class ó and she’ll be more likely to shoot some hoops with you.
Make it a joint effort with the emphasis on her health, not her size.
There are very unhealthy “skinny” people and very healthy “heavier” people out there.
Most of all, enjoy her as your lifelong partner spending wonderful time together.
It took a long time and many failures to finally find my soul mate … and I am enjoying every minute of it!

Ester Marsh is associate executive director of the J.F. Hurley Family YMCA. Contact her with health and fitness questions at 704-636-0111 or ehoeben@rowanymca.com.

Comments

Comments closed.

Education

Superintendent talks first 100 days, dives into district data

Business

‘It was an answer to a call:’ TenderHearted Home Care celebrates 10 years of providing care at home

News

Political Notebook: Local polls find increasing number of North Carolinians want COVID-19 vaccine

News

Trial begins on challenge to latest NC voter ID law

Local

Burch, Fisher, Marsh honored as 2021 recipients of Elizabeth Duncan Koontz Humanitarian Award

Landis

Landis board talks revenues, budget planning, department updates

College

College baseball: Catawba rolls 7-1 and 24-1

Nation/World

Student fires at officers at Tennessee school, is killed

Nation/World

Police: Minnesota officer meant to draw Taser, not handgun

Crime

Man receives consecutive prison sentences for sex offenses

Education

RSS Board of Education approves Faith Elementary sale

Coronavirus

Rowan Health Department receives 400 Pfizer, 800 Johnson & Johnson vaccines for week

Crime

Blotter: Accident in Food Lion only weekend shooting to produce injuries

Crime

Salisbury man charged with felony drug crimes

Crime

Second person charged in thefts from house near county line

Crime

Police use tear gas to end robbery stand off, arrest suspect

Local

Ask Us: When will Rowan Public Library’s West Branch open?

Nation/World

Prosecution case nears end in ex-cop’s trial in Floyd death

Nation/World

Officer accused of force in stop of Black Army officer fired

Crime

Blotter: Man charged with hitting man with car, fleeing while intoxicated

Local

‘Meet the need’: Rowan County Health Department looks to add to vaccination options

Local

Seaford is first woman in county hired for town manager position since the ’90s

Local

Colonial Spring Frolic makes a comeback to kick off museum’s year

Local

Concord City Council wants to name bridge for fallen officer, Rowan native