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What I learned in 2007: – I hate to start out with such a downer, but sometimes there are hard lessons you must learn.
The hardest lesson I learned this year was this: If you find someone you love and want to marry, you should tell him. Otherwise, he will take you out to dinner one night and for dessert, tell you that he wants to be in an exclusive relationship.
But not with you.
– Never go contradancing with Dave and Beth Cook. Lots of spinning will ensue, followed by dizziness and other awful maladies.
At least I didn’t throw up ó although by now Beth is one of those friends who would have held my hair for me.
– It doesn’t matter if you’re 40-something ó you can still go to the Father-Daughter Valentine’s Dance with your dad.
Oooh, it was a magical night.
I just wish I would’ve remembered to wear my tiara.
Dang.
– Everyone in your family needs a flu shot. Son Andrew had the flu this spring, and it was not pretty.
– Even if it rains a little bit for Pops at the Post, people will stay. THANK YOU!
Please join us June 7 at sunset.
Bring an umbrella.
Just in case.
– Just because you are driving your silver minivan doesn’t mean you have to be talking on your cell phone.
On the positive side, I went so far over my allotted minutes that it impressed Smith, my cell phone guy. He works for my service provider.
That should count for something, right?
– Speaking of cars, you never have to have extensive work on the minivan done in May or June. Heck no. It’s always the first of December.
Sigh.
My esteemed editorial page editor can attest to this. He blames me for his car troubles as well. Says I started it.
As far as my car went, it could’ve been a lot worse had I waited much longer.
Anybody ever heard of a stabilizer link?
Me either.
– Even if the other brand of hair color is $2 less than your normal brand, DO NOT buy it.
Otherwise, your hair will turn platinum. In a bad way. With, shall we say, interesting highlights.
Which led my young friend Taylor to come up to me at church and ask, “Susan, why is your hair blue?”
Her mother was not happy with her until I turned to her and she saw what Taylor saw.
And gasped.
My good friend, local styling guru Rick Bowman, advised me to wash my hair in Dawn a few times, and this seems to have done the trick.
Plus I went back and bought the original hair color and put it on.
Rick also said I could try a blond highlights shampoo, but he warned me, “Be careful, because yellow and blue make green.”
Oh, lordy.
My best friend Lisa said, “Next time, just spend the two bucks.”
Well said, my wise friend.
– When I was a kid, I never should have laughed when my older cousin had to go buy tampons from Jimmy Smith in a convenience store on the south end of Topsail Island.
He was soooo handsome ó she was soooo mortified.
When my friend Karen and I went to opening night of “Mamma Mia!” in Charlotte, guess what happened to me?
The sign on the machine in the ladies’ room said to go to the first aid station.
It wasn’t the 300-pound EMT who was behind the counter ó oh, no. It was the devastatingly handsome EMT, miles and miles cuter than Jimmy Smith.
Somewhere, my cousin was laughing.
– My mother learned this: If you are planning the family treasure hunt on Christmas morning for the holiday booty and you are going back and forth between both townhouses, you need to have ALL the sticky notes and you need to HAVE THEM IN ORDER.
We are still looking for the money.
– Gosh, and I guess I have a confession to make.
Remember that guy at the beginning of the column? Well, he has season tickets to the Panthers games, and I think I may possibly have said something along the lines of, “And I hope the Panthers lose the rest of the season, too!”
So, that would be my fault. Sorry, Panthers fans.
– And finally, God bless Mavis and Karen, who gave chocolate bars to a poor reporter who had none.
God bless those two, God bless our troops and see you in ’08.
– – –
Contact Susan Shinn at 704-797-4289 or e-mail her at sshinn@salisburypost.com.

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