When I was in school, I lost my childhood crush to a boy named Bill. Now, every time I   hear or read the word of name Bill, my past painfully comes rushing back to haunt me. I become enraged, ill, stressed, wronged by Bill.

So I am asking everyone out there who has ever been in a dispute, car accident, fight or had your feelings hurt by anyone named Bill, to please join me in a class-action lawsuit against the NFL and the NFL team the Buffalo Bills.

We should not have to suffer the injustice of our past, the pain inflicted by Bill, every time we pick up the sports page or watch football on TV and it all comes rushing back.

Yes, it’s time to stand up against Bill and what he has stood for. And while we are at it, how about “the power Bill,” “the grocery Bill,” “the gas Bill,” “the doctor Bill” etc. … just saying.

Where does it stop?

— Derek Ray

Idaho

Ray is a Landis native who was recently visiting in the area.