Unless it’s hidden beneath a pumpkin, there’s no monster to be found in the picture.

At some point, Bost asks the children about it. “Is the friendly monster real?” she might ask.

“No,” the children always say.

“He’s an imaginary friend,” some usually volunteer.

“How many of you have imaginary friends?” Bost says she asks. “They can raise their hands.”

That’s what others trained in child development say, as well.

Typically, children will play “Mommy” or “Daddy,” usually with family members, until about the age of 3, according to Kathy M. Shelton-Riek, a licensed clinical social worker and diplomate in the American Psychotherapy Association.

It is after the age of 3 that some children begin developing imaginary friends. “The imaginary friend might be anything from Superman to Lisa who’s coming to tea,” Riek says. “It may be someone they’ve had contact with, or it may be no one they’ve had contact with.

“It may be someone who they’ve seen on TV, and it’s fantasy.”

Children have vivid imaginations. Just watch a preschooler playing policeman or firefighter, Riek says.

At this point in a child’s development, she says, it’s fine for parents to ask, “What would John like for dinner?” Usually, children are going to pick their favorite foods.

“That’s engaging in play with a child,” Riek says. “That’s contact. That’s bonding with a child.”

If children still have imaginary friends past the age of 12, Riek says it might indicate an emotional problem.

Alan Hardy, guidance counselor at China Grove Elementary School, says it’s rare for children to have imaginary friends beyond the third grade.

Often, Hardy says he can pick up on how that child is interacting with others from what he says about the imaginary friend.

“If there are problems that are bothering the child, often he will talk through the imaginary friend,” he says. “When he really means ‘I’m angry about so and so,’ he will say, ‘my friend,’ whatever the friend is, ‘is angry about so and so.’ Children use the other person in the third person, but they’re actually talking about themselves.”

This is typical of young children, Riek says. “It’s easier for them to say ‘my friend did this’ in the third person, because it distances them from the intensity of the situation,” she says. “That’s not anything that’s abnormal.”

Marc L. Williams, a licensed professional counselor, says children with imaginary friends are typically children who don’t have siblings. “But you really can see it in anybody,” he says.

“Part of it depends on sort of the orientation of the child,” he says. “Are they real imaginary or involved in a lot of play activities involving imagination? Sometimes you see it in children who are just very lonely and don’t have a lot of contact with friends or what-not.”

Williams suggests that parents who are worried that their children’s imaginary friends are staying around longer than they should might want to take a look at their social lives. If they’re overly shy or timid, he says, “they might need to encourage the child to go out and try to make some friends or even have kids come over to their house, stuff like that.”

Parents might want to also consider going to school to watch their children interact on the playground, Williams says.

Sadly, in some cases, Hardy says, the imaginary friend may be the only friend a child has.

Developing friendships and peer pressure are two reasons imaginary friends disappear as a child gets older.

Children’s developmental stages also play a role, according to Riek. “If you were to try to say to a typical 8-year-old, ‘Look at the parrot on my shoulder’ and you have a bear there, the child is going to look at you like you’re crazy,” she says. “That’s because of their concreteness at that point. They’re not into that fantasy as much.”

Riek, who works with abused children, says some people say multiple personalities or the loss of identity that accompanies serious mental disorders is an extension of fantasy. “And it’s adaptive,” she says. “You may have a personality that takes on the role of being the caretaker for everyone else. She may have the personality that’s very agreeable or very submissive.”

Multiple personality disorder, for example, occurs, she says, when a child is subjected to extreme, consistent and/or severe trauma, and their personalities split off or fracture.