Wineka column: Marine welcomed home

Parker Graham, who just returned from the Marine Corps' recruit training at Parris Island, S.C., stands beside the welcome home sign in the front yard of his family's home off Dukeville Road. Photo by Mark Wineka, Salisbury Post

Deborah and Marcelle Graham attached every letter from their son, Parker, to a "clothesline" underneath the living room mantel. Photo by Mark Wineka, Salisbury Post.

Sitting at his kitchen table at home, Parker Graham, 19, has just returned from the Marine Corps Recruit Depot at Parris Island, S.C. Photo by Mark Wineka, Salisbury Post

Men with Shaw Construction, working on the expansion of the Buck Steam Plant, left $50 for Parker Grham in this cup. Photo by Mark Wineka, Salisbury Post

DUKEVILLE — When Parker Graham, a new Marine, returned home with his family on a recent Saturday, some 25 to 30 people stood in the front yard and spilled onto Dukeville Road.

A large homemade sign that his father, Marcelle, had fashioned out of conduit and a white bed sheet also welcomed him.

Some men from Shaw Construction already had left. They had stopped after seeing the sign and the growing crowd and left behind an orange insulated coffee mug from nearby Buck Steam Station, where they are working on an expansion project.

Inside the cup — $50.

“They just saw the sign and wanted to do something for him,” says Deborah Graham, Parker’s mother.

On another day, under the same sign, “Michelle” left a heartfelt personal note in an envelope with $20. Her late husband, Robert Clement, had been a Marine before he died as a Spencer police officer.

As the days on his leave continued, Parker found that wherever he wore his dress uniform — at church, at Kmart or in restaurants such as Blue Bay and Ryan’s — people kept approaching him.

They thanked him for wearing the uniform proudly. They thanked him for what he’s doing.

“I was prepared for it, but when it actually happened, I guess I wasn’t prepared for it,” Parker says. “I didn’t know how to take it, but it felt real good.”

You have to understand that 19-year-old Parker Graham is new to all this. He “only” has completed his three months of Marine Corps recruit training at Parris Island, S.C.

While Parris Island is one of the toughest boot camps in the military, Parker hasn’t been fighting in Iraq or Afghanistan. And he knows that many men and women before him have shared the boot camp experience.

So all the attention for just being a Marine at the start of a four-year commitment has caught him — and his family — a little bit off guard.

“It’s been overwhelming,” Deborah Graham says. “We just didn’t realize how much it was going to change our lives.”

Before he enlisted, the Grahams were not what you would call a “military family.”

Marcelle had never served. They had no close relatives in any of the services.

Parker, whose interests included fishing, baseball and church, had never shown any inclination toward the military life.

He attended North Rowan schools for the first 11 grades before being home-schooled in the 12th grade. He was able to play baseball for North Hills Christian School his final year.

In the months after completing high school, Parker cared daily for his mother, whose fusion surgery on an ankle at Duke University Medical Center left her unable to walk. He helped with cooking and pushing her wheelchair.

“We were already close, but this brought us closer together,” says Deborah, who had further repairs to her ankle seven weeks ago but is confident she’ll be walking again soon.

Still, Parker was a boy who slept until 11 a.m. and protested if he had to walk to the street to retrieve the mail or take out the trash, Deborah says. She and Marcelle prayed for him to find some direction.

His decision to join the Marines surprised the family, which includes older sister Alisha, an N.C. State University graduate who will be entering law school at N.C. Central in August.

“I prayed about it, and I was pretty sure that’s where God wanted me,” Parker says. “And they (the Marines) are the best.”

As a mother, Deborah reacted instinctively.

“I popped him upside the head,” she says.

To Deborah, Marines were guys who ate rats and lived in holes. But visits to their pastor and Navy, Army and Marine recruiters further cemented Parker’s decision.

He left April 19 for the longest weeks in his life. The letters he sent home were strung under the fireplace mantel with clothespins. Deborah says she could always tell from Marcelle’s face as he walked back from the mailbox whether there was a letter from Parker.

Deborah wrote him daily and tried to include a tract from their church, New Hope Baptist, that maybe her son could share with members of his 32-man platoon.

At Parris Island, Parker’s days started at 4 a.m., and the intense exercise regimen included, of course, a lot of pull-ups, sit-ups, running and combat fitness tests such as ammunition lifts and maneuvering under fire.

In shooting exercises, Parker gained an “expert” rating.

All Marines are familiar with The Crucible, a 54-hour culmination to training that involves deprivation of sleep and food.

Recruits have to travel 48 miles on foot, execute 29 problem-solving exercises and carry 45 pounds of gear while having only three ready-to-eat meals over the three days.

Parker, who stands 6-1 and weighs 196 pounds, says he entered recruit training at 200 pounds, probably lost 15 pounds and replaced most of it with muscle.

At Family Day and graduation ceremonies at Parris Island, the family didn’t immediately recognize the transformed boy in front of them.

“I just lost it whenever I saw him in his uniform,” Alisha said. “I’m just so proud of him, my little brother.”

Parker must leave on a bus Monday morning for 29 days at Camp Geiger in Jacksonville, then it’s off to Missouri for Military Occupations Specialty school, where he will learn the finer points of being a combat engineer.

The refrigerator at home is filled with things such as popcorn cake, spaghetti, barbecue and chicken fettucini — and Parker has eaten a good share of it.

As time allowed during his time off, he fished with Marcelle or his friends. He also has gone bowling and played some video games.

One day, after Deborah called down to Buck Steam Station, the men from Shaw Construction stopped by for about 20 minutes to visit with Parker.

The $50 they had given him will go toward purchasing a new vinyl cap for his uniform.

“I take a lot of pride in it,” he says of being a Marine.

It’s good to hear he’s not alone.

Contact Mark Wineka at 704-797-4263, or mwineka@ salisburypost.com