Was it an accident, Daddy?

Did God mean for you to be this way, Daddy, or was it an accident?

This seemingly innocent and simple question of a 7-year-old child is one I’ve been asking myself most of my life. We all do, in one way or another.

In Director Jessie Nelson’s new film “I Am Sam,” actor Sean Penn plays Sam Dawson, a mentally handicapped adult trying to raise his daughter on his own. His 7-year-old daughter, Lucy, played by actress Dakota Fanning, asks him this very question. Insightful for a child.

Why are some people born handicapped? Why are children born with terminal illnesses? How can a life so innocent deserve a life so challenged?

Every life has challenges, but some seem to be more difficult or unfair.

Growing up with a handicapped sibling, I think everyone in my family has asked the same questions a thousand times.

Why him?

Why our family?

The reason Lucy’s question strikes me as peculiar is because it is posed by a child. Let’s face it, children can be very mean, usually because they don’t know any better. Remember what the mean kids did to the outcast of the class?

But the sad thing is that sometimes adults aren’t much better.

Look at the movies we watch. “Something About Mary” was a hit, and it blatantly made fun of handicapped people. Somehow it is socially acceptable to laugh at the expense of mentally and physically challenged individuals.

Look at our everyday terminology: “I’m so retarded.” “You’re such a retard.” Jokes about the short bus. These are things people say in a work environment, watch in movies or on television or allow their children to say.

If you made disparaging comments about another race or religion, about someone’s age or weight, it would cause an uproar, and rightly so. Harassment — sexual or any other kind — is such a huge issue in our hypersensitive society. Yet this forgotten minority continues to be patronized in our homes, in our workplaces and in the media.

We do charity walks and donate money to organizations to help handicapped people, but often if we get on an elevator with someone who is handicapped, we shy away from them. It’s much easier to feel pity for someone than to actually take the time to befriend them or simply have a conversation.

Imagine for a moment what it would be like to be so different that people are intimidated to approach you, to have little to no normal social interaction. Imagine trying as hard as you can at something and failing and feeling like the whole world is laughing at you.

I think maybe the reason God puts handicapped people in our lives is to teach us something. It’s ironic how someone with such a simple mind can teach us one of the greatest lessons of life — basic human compassion.

In today’s busy society we have so much going on, but I think most would agree that love is the most wonderful and powerful thing in our lives. True unconditional love is so rare. Nowadays, not even all parents give that to their children. I think we have so much to learn from the innocent, unconditional love of this special group of people.

Was it an accident?

I don’t think so.

Contact Jillian McCartney at 704-797-4253 or jmccartney@salisburypost.com .