Officials say such abuse is common

Every nine seconds.

That’s how often a husband or boyfriend beats a woman, according to statistics provided by the Family Abuse Crisis Council of Rowan County.

Four million women suffer from domestic violence each year.

Four are murdered every day. Three out of those four are killed trying to leave an abusive relationship.

Even with all those statistics, Elizabeth Patton, director of the Family Abuse Crisis Council, said domestic abuse is one of the most under-reported crimes, because of fear.

She has a message for battered women: “There’s a better way; you and your children do not have to live in fear.”

Patton said Marie Coleman’s relationship with Dwight Coleman — who shot her at their home Wednesday morning — sends up red flags. His two arrests for assaulting his wife before he shot her sent a message.

“I would tell her if she’d taken out two complaints against her husband, she needed to go into a shelter for a couple of days,” Patton said.

Her organization provides a shelter, where women can stay up to 45 days free of charge.

While there, they can receive counseling for themselves and their children.

The shelter operates at an undisclosed location, so women are safe. At the council’s telephone crisis line — 704-636-4718 — women can speak to someone 24 hours a day.

In Cabarrus County, abused women can call CVAN 24 hours a day at 704-788-2826. The organization also provides a shelter and support groups.

Signs that a man may be abusive towards women include abusing animals or children, Patton said.

Verbal and emotional abuse usually precedes physical abuse.

In court records pertaining to Dwight Coleman’s prior arrests for assaulting his wife, Marie Coleman said her husband had threatened her life.

“If he is threatening that he may kill her ... it very well may happen,” Patton said.

Family and friends say that Marie Coleman may have been preparing to leave Dwight Coleman. Patton said that is potentially the most dangerous time in an abusive relationship.

Abuse is “just a way of controlling the victim,”she said. “When she says she is leaving, the reason he becomes so dangerous at that point is he has lost control. He’s going to regain control at all costs, even if that includes murder.”