Is that the sound of eight tiny reindeer on the roof, or has the Hazmat team gotten another call?Probably the former. Here are some items Santa should leave under the tree for Salisbury and Rowan tonight:

1. For Spencer: Boxing gloves for the longest-running mayor’s race in town history and, in the end, a clean knockout by the winner —no more TKO’s or names drawn from hats.

• For Rowan voters:A scorecard to keep track of all the candidates who would be sheriff in 2002. And a spreadsheet to help them figure out which legislative district they live in.
• n For the Rowan County Courthouse:A bomb-threat zapper —and an air-tight security plan to back it up.
• For Rowan-Salisbury Schools:A sexual-deviant zapper to screen teachers. And an extra bundle of school-materials cash for the 99.999 percent of teachers who go about their jobs ethically and properly each day, yet suffer a little each time one of their coworkers gets mired in controversy.
• Also for Rowan-Salisbury schools:A pot of gold to make the next round of school expansions and renovations first-class and lasting, and some magical leprechauns with sharp redistricting skills. (The superintendent’s name is Wiley O’Doby, isn’t it?)
• For Salisbury and Charlotte:A pair of water pistols to settle the score on who’s going to get southern Rowan’s water business. Charlotte may have a lower price, but Salisbury has plenty of water, and a contract to go with it.
• For Kannapolis voters:A hyperbole detector to help them sift through the claims and counterclaims bound to arise as the city takes another vote on alcoholic beverages.
• n For people who live near the CP&Lplant in western Rowan: A Redwood forest to buffer their property from the expanding plant.
• For Rowan Helping Ministries, the Salvation Army, the Red Cross and all the other agencies that do so much to help so many: Lots of donated coats, cans of soup (and other staples), volunteer workers and cash contributions to help our less fortunate neighbors make it through this winter.
• For teen-age drivers: Seatbelts that are always buckled, speedometers that stay within the posted limit, eyes that are locked on the highway ahead — and constant awareness of the sorrow and regret that can result from a moment of inattention or recklessness behind the wheel.
• For Elizabeth Dole: A set of primary-season barbells and a true primary opponent so she can build up her debating muscles and be ready for the really tough match in November against Erskine Bowles or Elaine Marshall. Dole can’t count on charm and celebrity status to win the election for her. Just ask Richard Petty.
• For our readers: Safe and happy holidays.