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CHINA GROVE — After years of squabbling, competing and bickering, the towns of China Grove and Landis are ready for a merger.
Not exactly a merger in the bureaucratic sense.
Officials from both towns will participate in a wedding that is expected to be unforgettable.
The China Grove Historical Society is staging a womanless wedding, featuring a host of town and community leaders. Proceeds will go toward the ongoing restoration of the China Grove Roller Mill.
Barbara Doby will direct the wedding and is heading the fund-raising effort.
Doby said that more than 100 years ago when the roller mill was built, it served most of southern Rowan County. Landis didn’t exist as a town, and most of the area was just one big community.
“People came to the mill to bring grain, to sit around and talk, swap stories and have fun,” said Doby.
She and other organizers believe the wedding can restore some of that fun. Instead of fighting over annexation and other things, they want the communities to come together, much like they did a 100 years ago, to have have a good laugh — a lot of laughs.
China Grove Mayor Joseph Sloop is cast as the groom. On June 16, he will “wed” Mayor Fred Steen in the role of “Tiny Bubbles.” The groom is “Bubba Hicks,” a member of the well- known Hicks family, led by “Annex Hicks,” portrayed by the Rev. Edward Daniels.
It may be a bit of a shotgun affair. Doby hinted the bride may be very pregnant.
Songs for the event will include Dr. David King’s rendition of “You’re Having My Baby.”
The “red neck ushers” include China Grove Town Clerk Walter Hamel, Landis Police Chief H.F. Jones, China Grove Elementary Principal Bob Bloodworth, Landis Public Works Director Tommy Branch, Scott Carpenter, Mike Sheely, Jack Shaw, Yancy Doby and King.
Hamel, renowned for perhaps the driest sense of humor around, will be paired with bridesmaid Landis Town Clerk Bob Wood, aka “Penny Landis.”
Wood, who joined several other participants at the news conference, indicated he’s planning a few surprises for Hamel.
Hamel isn’t talking.
At the news conference, Wood and Landis Mayor Pro Tem Gary Beaver swapped recollections with Doby, Judy Haire of the China Grove Board of Trade, and the Rev. Edward Daniel, president of the Historical Society.
Doby said most people in China Grove have ties to Landis and the other communities, including Concordia and Grace Lutheran churches and the Bostian and Enochville school communities.
Although the 30-some people will participate in the wedding, organizers are encouraging each one to “free-lance” his own role and spice up his costume.
China Grove Police Chief Michael Bentley may wear his coonskin cap and a poncho and carry his flintlock rifle.
Organizers had counted on Bentley for the main course in the pre-wedding dinner.
A squirrel stew has been replaced with a “hobo” supper.
The police chief has been too busy interviewing dogs for the canine unit and accepting federal grants to shoot squirrels.
Doby said the dinner is now being handled by the Sneaky family from Frog Holler.
The pre-wedding supper, 6-7:30 p.m., will feature pinto beans, slaw and cornbread. It will be served in the South Rowan High School cafeteria. Tickets for the dinner are $3 each at the door.
The wedding will follow at 8 p.m. in the school auditorium. Doby said it will feature doctors, lawyers, merchants, town officials and just about everybody but an Indian chief.
Among other bridesmaids will be John Bame, Frank Jones, Al Welter, Jerry Hegler, Landis Mayor Pro Tem Gary Beaver and Former China Grove Mayor Harold Simpson.
Dr. Eric Troyer and China Grove Town Attorney Tom Brooke are cast as grandmothers of the bride.
Kevin Cherry, director of the history room of the Rowan Public Library, is expected to show off a lot of leg, as a very tall bridesmaid. He will accompany ring bearer Landis Alderman Butch Bivens.
Ira Lee Baker as Fingers Baldwin will provide the wedding music. As Pastor Sonny Parsons, the Rev. Robert Yountz will perform the marriage.
A reception will follow the wedding to allow guests to mingle with “the lovely ladies” and extend best wishes to the “Happy Couple.”
Admission to the wedding and reception will be $5.
The Historical Society is planning several fund-raising events with a major campaign kickoff on July 15th at Farmers Day for Phase 3 of the restoration. Improvement will include a teaching area for students and tour groups to learn of South Rowan’s farming heritage.
For more information about the Roller Mill project or the womanless wedding, call 855-8329.
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