Big Apple bites back at Rocker

BY RONNIE GALLAGHER
SALISBURY POST

• New York’s pizza.
• New York’s roast beef heroes.
• New York’s assault on John Rocker.

After nine years of being married to a New York Italian from Long Island, this is the first time I’ve returned home from the place where they talk funny without mentioning food first. Rocker’s descent on Shea Stadium as a member of the Atlanta Braves took precedent over everything for those living in and around that city.

The Rocker assault did not occur against a New York Met or a New York Mets fan. The real assault came from the New York media, where Newsday, the New York Post and the Daily News waged a war of words that bordered on insanity.

Rocker’s insanity.

Before the first game even began, the media outlets, who thrive on beating each other’s brains out with looney headlines, knew they had to be at their comedic best.

The NBADraft? Booor-ing. Wimbledon? Booor-ing. John Rocker, the man who bashed everyone and everything in New York from gays to foreigners to unwed, pregnant teenagers, was in town and it was their duty to give him some of that warmhearted, loving, New York hospitality.

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The first game of the series came on Thursday night. But the papers came out on Thursday morning.

Uh-oh.

The Daily News had photos of Rocker on the front and back covers of its tabloid.

“Rocker Wimps Out (No.7)” one headline screamed.

He was mentioned in every single story about the teams. He was referred to as baseball’s Mike Tyson.

The Post, the most famous for its headlines, called him “Public Enemy No. 1 in New York.”

“Rocker’s going to be the apple of New York’s ire” another headline said.

“Shea-hem over Rocker.”

“Johnny Rotten.”

Six stories with Rocker prominently mentioned.

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But Newsday won out with its pregame bombs.

First, an artist’s rendition of what Rocker would look like on the cartoon channel with the words, “Rocker circus roars into Shea.”

A column inside was addressed to “Mr. Dimwit, our immigrant visitor for the weekend.”

Then, you see a two-page spread on Rocker’s hometown, Macon Ga.

New York reporters seemed to be holed up in bars, in barber shops and drug stores. They reported that everyone down there seems to be very tired of the Johnny Rotten saga.

Didn’t matter. The reporters were there to get the scoop.

So Newsday made sure we knew that in Macon Ga., a city of 106,612, there were 900 people with AIDS and thousands more who are HIV positive. There are 400 pregnant girls, 650 people on parole and 5,000 more on felony probation.

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Rocker pitched one inning that first night and with the help of a wild Robin Ventura swing for a third strike, got out unscathed. He walked off the field, glaring up into the stands.

The ratings for both team’s networks soared through the roof.

But Rocker had to ruin everything. He said he was sorry for the remarks in Sports Illustrated.

The media’s reaction? Let’s go with that.

So, the next morning, the headlines read:

“Well, shut my mouth. Rocker apologizes.”

“Bad Boy says New York not so bad and neither is he.”

Mike Lupica writes, “This ballplayer’s mea culpa is a pitch the whole city can applaud.”

(How many citizens of Macon know what “mea culpa” means? Those New York guys are always showing off.)

Phil Mushnick of the Post, who was in Salisbury two years ago as New York’s top sportswriter, even berated his own, saying the media had blown this thing up way too much:

“Shameless media fanning Rocker flames.”

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But obviously, Mushnick’s cohorts weren’t reading him.

A Post headline beside one of the most gosh-awful-looking cartoon faces you’ll ever see (it was supposed to be Rocker), blared out, “Stupid is as stupid does.”

And then, the paper invited us to sit down and enjoy some of their best John Rocker jokes.

Here’s a sampling:

• What is John Rocker’s least favorite rock group? Foreigner.
• Did you hear about the HMO that turned down John Rocker’s brain transplant? They said it was an experimental treatment.
• Why can’t Ted Turner and John Rocker ever be neighbors in New York? They don’t allow trailer parks.

There were plenty of others but this is the Salisbury Post, not the New York Post. I don’t know if the Bible belters could take it on a Sunday morning so we’ll stop. You’ve probably heard them all by now, anyway.

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On the final day of the series, Rocker tossed a ball into the bleachers as a goodwill gesture (yeah, right) and a fan threw it back.

Some of the 700 cops on duty stormed him as if he was standing on the beach at Normandy. They handcuffed him and sent him to the clink on charges of reckless endangerment. But that’s OK. He got his photo in the paper.

Rocker didn’t pitch after Game 1 due to a callous on his finger (a callous finger for a callous man?) and the teams would split the four games. But the papers would not relinquish their embrace on Johnny Rotten.

On the cover of Newsday after the final game, there wasn’t the star player showcased. It was Rocker, for cryin’ out loud, leaving the field with his arm around pitching coach Leo Mazzone.

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On July 4, the Braves and Mets were playing somebody else. But Rocker was still in the New York headlines.

To celebrate Independence Day, one paper wrote a story about Rocker.

Beside his photo were the words, “Red(neck), White &Blue American.”

Bad taste? Of course it was bad taste.

And that’s when I put down the paper and picked up my pizza and hero.

New York food is something that even an overdose of Johnny Rotten can’t spoil.

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Ronnie Gallagher is the sports editor of the Post.